The Point has two very good reasons to be happy.

1. It's Friday.
2. President Zuma has nominated the new chief justice… and it is not Judge Hlophe!

You see? I'm not all cynicism and sarcastic barbs. I too can appreciate life's silver-linings and compliment Msholozi when he makes a good decision. Yip, that was a compliment.

Of course, there would be very little point to this column if I were all sunshine and butterflies. So without further ado: a judge, a bishop, and a cowboy walk into a bar…

THE JUDGE

Well, make that two judges. In the blue corner we have the honourable Chief Justice Pius Langa and in the red corner, the Cape Judge President John Hlophe.

Langa on the court's decision to inform the public about the charges against Hlophe: "If it were to emerge later, that we had swept something like this under the carpet that would have caused enormous damage".

Ah, a judge who thinks about the integrity and reputation of the judiciary.

And then, in the red corner: "For 17 days I was being lynched and that was caused by my colleagues… I was lynched and insulted because of their conduct".

Hmm… this raises a few questions. The most pertinent of which are: does Hlophe possess supernatural powers which allow him to rise from the dead (daily) or was it just a really slow lynching?

For those less familiar with the word 'lynch', a dictionary definition: to seize somebody believed to have committed a crime and put him or her to death immediately and without trial, usually by hanging.

Perhaps it was a metaphorical lynching. The judges hung him out to dry.

THE BISHOP

South Africa's favourite robe-wearing peace-warrior gave the country two reasons to smile this week. Firstly, he was awarded the Presidential Media of Freedom by Barack Obama.

"I am overwhelmed, deeply honoured, humbled and something that I don't often get to be, speechless.

And then Tutu found his voice once more to do what few in South Africa seemed willing or bothered to do — condemn the street-trashing that took place during the municipal strike.

"I get annoyed when people trash streets and say that they are exercising their rights. They exercise their rights by infringing on other people's rights."

Cleanliness, it would seem, is next to godliness.

THE COWBOY

There's a new sheriff in town and he means business. Yip, Bheki Cele is all about burying criminals and throwing out bad apples.

On dealing with criminals: "Either he acts correctly or we bury him".

Erm… I hate to state the obvious, but criminals, by their very definition, do not act correctly.

On changing police laws: "One thing we must relook at is how to allow police to do their work. We are not encouraging rookies or cowboys but we are not handcuffing police to die alone".

Rookies and cowboys. Not two words that I would usually group together. Cowboys and Indians: yes. By extension, cowboys and cops: maybe.

And finally, on police corruption: "If you can remember that Jesus Christ had 12 disciples and one of them was a criminal. In the SAPS we will always have corrupt cops who, like bad apples, will be thrown out of the basket."

Talk about a mixed metaphor. The point that intrigues me the most, however, is: who is being equated with Jesus Christ?

THE PUNCHLINE

The judge, the bishop and the cowboy get into an argument about who is closest to God. The bishop tugs on his robes and states the obvious. The cowboy throws out an analogy involving Jesus, Judas, and a basket of apples. The judge stands up, grabs the cowboy's gun, says 'That's nothing' and shoots himself in the head…

Okay, I admit it, that was pretty lame… but you try coming up with a joke involving a judge, a bishop, and a cowboy.

What has The Point missed? Share your favourite quote from the week below!

The beggar gauntlet Rebekah Kendal reckons that begging is bad for SA because it fosters a culture of dependency.

Visit our politics page Need the latest political news, features, interviews and profiles? Visit our dedicated page...

Behind closed doors Rebekah Kendal reckons that the real losers in the Percy saga are victims of domestic abuse.