Let's play a game of broken telephone. You know: that game you played as a kid ? I whisper a secret in your ear; you whisper it into the next kid's ear; we all laugh at the message that comes out the other end. Somewhat like South African politics, really.

Here goes:

'President Zuma launched his hotline this week.'

Whisper, whisper.

'President Zuma came out in support of Caster Semenya.'

Whisper, whisper.

"Even if a test is done, the ANCYL will never accept the categorisation of Caster Semenya as a hermaphrodite, because in South Africa and the entire world of sanity, such does not exist."

Whisper, whisper.

Ah, no, wait? that was Floyd Shivambu. But it does kind of sound like the mangled product of a very long chain of broken telephone, doesn't it?

OF SNAILS AND MEN

I am rather curious, however, about Floyd's system of categorisation. For instance, do 'hermaphrodites' (Floyd, Floyd, Floyd? the correct term is intersexed individuals) exist in the world of insanity? Perhaps more importantly, do politicians? And what about snails, which are actually, technically, hermaphrodites?

I am willing to place a substantial bet (at least R27.50) on which world Sports and Recreation Minister Makhenkesi Stofile inhabits.

"They indicate that she is a hermaphrodite. For me that means nothing. The issue here is not whether she is a hermaphrodite or not."

Erm? could I interject here? No? Okay?

"Where is the science that says they (intersexed individuals) have an advantage?"

Ah, well, that was worth the wait.

For the record, I put my R27.50 on the world not inhabited by snails. Or, for that matter, many other people.

We can only hope that the war he has promised ? "I think it would be the third world war" ? will be waged in that world rather than our own.

NICE DOCUMENTS

The chap with his very own toll-free number has taken a far more, well, presidential approach to the matter.

"I think we are faced with an unfortunate situation in this country where we claim to respect privacy and the rights of people, but then we do something that moves against those principles and values."

Strangely, I find myself agreeing with the president (note to self: check the garden for snails) on this point and the next. In lambasting unruly soldiers he said the following:

"The failure to respect the laws of the land, and the rights of others enshrined in the Constitution, points to a serious problem that we must urgently address as government, as we have done, through law enforcement."

When he used the words 'Constitution' and 'law enforcement' in the same sentence, I'm pretty sure that this is not what Zuma had in mind.

"We are tired of waving nice documents like the Constitution and the Human Rights Charter in criminals' faces. We are going to meet these thugs head-on and if it means we kill when we shoot, then so be it."

He may want to pull Police Minister Nathi Mthethwa into that little chat he has with young Julius about going "overboard".

THEM ROTTEN POTATOES

Nathi Mthethwa and his top cop Bheki Cele were all about weeding out those rotten? um? potatoes this week.

"A stern warning has to be sent to those who think that being in the police means you can do as you wish, you can treat people with contempt. There are such potatoes," said Mthethwa

And apparently they are ugly potatoes.

"Right now the list that I have is that we have arrested 556 of them. They are arrested by ourselves," said Bheki Cele. "We are in safe hands with many, many good officers who deal thoroughly with those ugly guys".

Well, since the Scorpions are no longer, I can't imagine who else would be doing all that arresting.

QUOTE OF THE WEEK

This week, there were three contenders for quote of the week. Kicking us off, BMW Blade:

"I have not abandoned my values. I don't think I've abandoned my moral leadership. I am still a communist, I am still committed to the working class."

Yip, just like Stalin, Mao Zedong, and Fidel Castro.

From Health Minister Aaron Motsoaledi:

"If the scourge of HIV and TB is a snake, the head is South Africa. If you want to kill a snake, you start with the head and it will die."

Hmm? I suspect it is not a good idea to delve too deeply into that metaphor.

And, finally, from the dictator-next-door:

"Who said the British and the Americans should rule over others? That's why we say down with you. We have not invited these bloody whites. They want to poke their nose into our affairs. Refuse that."

On a totally unrelated topic: Britain provides the majority of relief aid to Zimbabwe, without which the country would face a massive humanitarian crisis.

The Point invites you to vote in this week's poll: Least likely to share oxygen with snails?