Power utility Eskom says it is delighted with its latest euphemism, released to the media last week. According to the press release, "unplanned power cuts could occur at very short notice", which Eskom says is a state-of-the-art way of describing the total failure of the power grid, for no reason, with nobody held accountable.

Eskom spokesman Sparks Maponya said the corporation has been concerned for some time how an already stressed public would respond to the news that the national power grid was about to collapse without notice at any moment.

"Focus groups suggested that our Inevitable Failure Scenario Announcement would not sufficiently reassure the nation," said Maponya.

According to Maponya, this announcement, to be sent automatically to all media in the event of a total collapse of the grid, would have read, 'The grid, it is broken. No, I don't know. I just work here. I'm on lunch. No, I don't know. Okay bye.'

But Maponya said the new press release had already achieved its goal by "not causing widespread civil pandemonium".

Meanwhile, the release has also been hailed by the country's scientific community, who say they have finally been provided with a palatable way of warning the public of the end of the world.

"For years we've been struggling with how to publicise he doomsday scenario without freaking out the population," said Dr Fritz de Kat of the South African Large Telescope in Sutherland.

"I mean, if Earth is going to obliterated by a comet in the next day or two, what do you do? Do you go on the Noeleen show? And if you do, how do you even begin to explain to Noeleen what a comet is?"

However, he said, thanks to Eskom's groundbreaking "unplanned power cuts could occur at very short notice", the country's astronomers would prepare a statement to the effect that "unplanned extinction of life could occur at very short notice".

"It's so perfect because it reflects utter helplessness," said De Kat.

"Whether you're dealing with Eskom or global annihilation, it's the same thing: nobody is responsible, and there's no-one to turn to."

For more from SA's best satirical website, www.hayibo.com, please click here.