As South Africa celebrates Youth Day, thousands have embraced the spirit of the youth by, like, doing whatever. The public holiday commemorates some kids who were like killed or whatever for protesting something a long time ago, and young people have praised it for giving them a chance to share a common sense of feeling hard done by.
As Youth Day celebrations got underway in urban centers around the country today, organisers said it was uplifting to see that the youth were more idle, apathetic and ignorant than at any time since 1994.
"The struggle for democracy in South Africa was about, like, hectic stuff," said Youth Commissioner Pixie Ledwaba. "Those kids fought and died in 1976 so that we as South Africans, as Africans, could like get totally assimilated into American hip-hop culture, aaight?"
Asked how the youth of 2008 would have responded to the apartheid police's onslaught on the class of 1976, she said that they would have "totally sued those police dudes for like brutality and shit".
"Being shot at with actual bullets must have totally lowered their self-esteem," she said.
"That's what we've learned from '76: there is no more brutal or evil act than lowering someone's self esteem, other than maybe like totally embarrassing them in front of their friends like at the mall, or like having their mom fetch them from a club dressed in a nightgown and shit."
Ledwaba said that youths across the country had agreed to hold ten seconds of silence "to help us remember that not everybody always had an iPod".
Meanwhile, the head of the Youth Commission, Rambo Tsotsotso, 46, said that South Africa's youth was finally competing on the world youth stage.
"You take fourteen years of outcomes-based education, a burgeoning sense of entitlement, a culture based on materialism and instant gratification, and you have a youth than can compete with anything the rest of the world has to offer."
He said South African youths had once looked at Americans teens and "marveled at how they couldn't speak in full sentences or point out their own country on a map".
"Today that's us," he said proudly. "Aaight?"
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